Maximum Security

[Riddick]

Didja hear about the fed up good ole boy who came up with a DIY security system at next to no cost? You can't beat it with a stick AND it's SHEER GENIUS

First, he took down his Rebel flag (which you can't buy on EBAY any more) and peeled the NRA sticker off his front window.

Next, he disconnected his home alarm system and quit the Neighborhood Watch.

After that he bought two Pakistani flags and put one at each corner of the front yard.

Then, he purchased the black flag of ISIS (which you CAN buy on EBAY!) and ran it up the flag pole.

Now the local police, sheriff, FBI, CIA, NSA, Homeland Security, Secret Service and other agencies are all watching his house 24/7.

He's NEVER felt safer and he's saving the $69.95 a month ADT used to charge him.

Plus, he bought burkas to wear when he shops or travels.

Everyone moves out of the way, and security can't pat him down.

If they say he's a male wearing a burka, he just says "I'm feeling like a woman today."

Hot Damn...Safe at last!!

[Malaria_Kidd II]

Wow! He has no worries unless ISIS and the Paki's are on the lookout for blasphemers; true or false!

Great ideas anyways Riddick! I've had my laugh for the day!

MK II