Cold as ....

Moderator: Super Moderators

Post Reply
User avatar
voguy
Pirate
Posts: 4175
Joined: 06-01-2011 05:47 PM
Location: Moving Target (soon SA)

Cold as ....

Post by voguy » 01-17-2016 09:53 AM

My hero! Use your imagination on the word used, or read the link below.

No sanction for BBC’s Carol Kirkwood over ‘cold as f*ck’ weather forecast
Saturday 16 January 2016 by Neil Tollfree - Carol Kirkwood


The BBC has announced that there will be no punishment for popular weather presenter Carol Kirkwood’s use of the phrase ‘cold as ****.’

She used the phrase during an outside broadcast on a hill in the North York Moors on Friday morning in response to a question from colleague Bill Turnbill.

“And now to Carol for the weather,” said the avuncular bee-keeper.

“Carol, it looks a bit chilly where you are?”

“That’s right Billy,” she responded chirpily.

“It’s cold as ****.”

“I’m sorry?” replied a visibly shocked Turnbill.

“Cold. As. ****.” She repeated, forcefully.

“Bastard cold. **** cold. Cold as an eskimo’s arse. Cold as a witch’s tit. Cold enough to worry any brass monkeys. It is abso-****-lutely **** cold as **** ****.”

“I see,” stammered Mr Turnbill.

“Um, so is there any detail on the forecast for-”

“No. Cold as ****. Probably some rain in Scotland and the North, I mean, I haven’t checked but it’s a fair assumption. Now, sod this, I’m going to get off this God-forsaken blasted bastard heath and try and find somewhere in this hellish backwater with the ability to make a decent cup of coffee.”

She then dropped the mic and stalked off muttering about being a proper scientist, not a performing penguin.

The BBC has issued a statement saying there would be no sanction for Miss Kirkwood because “after investigation we have discovered that on the North York Moors on Friday morning, it was indeed cold as ****.”

http://newsthump.com/2016/01/16/no-sanc ... -forecast/
"I predict future happiness for Americans if they can prevent the government from wasting the labors of the people under the pretense of taking care of them." - Thomas Jefferson

User avatar
fos
Pirate
Posts: 467
Joined: 01-18-2006 07:18 PM

Re: Cold as ....

Post by fos » 01-17-2016 12:23 PM

1 degree here in Kansas last night. It was as cold as *%$(^%% !

Pick your own pronoun. (Or whatever you call it in proper grammar.)

Jeff

User avatar
voguy
Pirate
Posts: 4175
Joined: 06-01-2011 05:47 PM
Location: Moving Target (soon SA)

Re: Cold as ....

Post by voguy » 01-17-2016 01:04 PM

Cold doesn't bother me. Heat does. Could not live in Memphis in the summer.
"I predict future happiness for Americans if they can prevent the government from wasting the labors of the people under the pretense of taking care of them." - Thomas Jefferson

User avatar
Doka
Pirate
Posts: 7967
Joined: 09-02-2009 08:15 PM

Re: Cold as ....

Post by Doka » 01-17-2016 02:40 PM

That is so funny, what a girl, she is the "Trump" of weather reporters. :coolhat:

We just went through a bunch of single didgets , now we are in the mellow 30s.
KARMA RULES

Those Who Can Make You Believe Absurdities, Can Make You Commit Atrocities': Voltaire

User avatar
Riddick
Pirate
Posts: 15703
Joined: 11-01-2002 03:00 AM
Location: Heartland USA
Contact:

Re: Cold as ....

Post by Riddick » 01-17-2016 06:23 PM

The furnace is getting a workout here - Nice day to be staying inside, 3 below outside now, never got to zero

Another cold one coming up, but I'll be going out for work. Some folks have Monday off, but I ain't one of 'em...
A mind should not be so open that the brains fall out; however, it should not be so closed that whatever gray matter which does reside may not be reached. ART BELL

Everything Woke turns to Image
-Donald Trump Image

User avatar
voguy
Pirate
Posts: 4175
Joined: 06-01-2011 05:47 PM
Location: Moving Target (soon SA)

Re: Cold as ....

Post by voguy » 01-18-2016 05:35 PM

And to think that I got reprimanded for saying, "Colder than a room full of ex-wives."
"I predict future happiness for Americans if they can prevent the government from wasting the labors of the people under the pretense of taking care of them." - Thomas Jefferson

Post Reply

Return to “Earth/ Weather/ Climate”