Political Humor

[Riddick]

Good old A.I.! I think I'll have a glass of Original California Sunshine. The only orange juice that tastes like a good, sweet orange.

You may favor genuine CA OJ flavor but wherever the fruit comes from doesn't matter as there's only one way it's gonna come out & that's sweeter than sweet & better than ever when it's freshly squeezed by The Man With The Golden Touch

Who in their right mind wouldn't prefer his WH return when everything the physically & mentally compromised current Oval Office occupant comes in contact with turns to pure ESS AITCH EYE TEE, KWIM?

[Malaria_Kidd II]

Well, what a blending of your two replies into one topic. Showing our new state of the nation which ain't peachy. I just saved a banana!

Your ending code must have been on topic too!

ESS AITCH EYE TEE, KWIM? That might take a while to figure out.


MK II FDNY 343

[Riddick]

President Biden visits a remote Native American reservation. With news and camera crews following him around as they tour the place, the President asks the Indian chief if there is anything they need.

"Well," says the chief, "We have three very important needs. First, we have a medical clinic, but no doctor to run it.”

Biden whips out his cellphone, dials a number, talks to somebody for two minutes, then hangs up. "I've pulled some strings. Your well-trained doctor will arrive in five days.” "Now what was the second problem?”

"We have no way to get clean water. The local mining operation has poisoned the water our people have been drinking for hundreds of years. We've been flying bottled water in, but it's terribly expensive.”

Once again, Biden dials a number, yells into the phone for a few minutes, and then hangs up. "The mine has been shut down permanently per my orders, and the owner is being billed for setting up a water purification plant for your people.”

"Now what was that third problem?" asks Biden.

The chief stares at him and says, "We have no cellphone reception up here!"

[Malaria_Kidd II]

That was a CLASSIC conclusion so fitting for a lier not taking his daily Previgen and Turmeric. It could get worse Riddick.


MK II

[Riddick]

Suddenly a cow runs out onto the road, and a limo driving late at night hits it head on, and the car comes to a stop.

The woman in the back seat, in her usual abrasive manner, says to the Chauffeur, "Get out and check on that poor cow. You were driving."

So the chauffeur gets out, checks, and reports that the animal is dead, but it appeared to be very old. Well, says the woman, "You were driving, so go and tell the farmer in that lighted farmhouse over there."

Two hours later the chauffeur returns totally inebriated, a full belly, his hair ruffled, and a big grin on his face.

“My God, what happened to you?" asks the nasty woman.

The chauffeur replies, "When I got there, the farmer opened his best bottle of single malt scotch, the wife gave me a meal fit for a king, and the daughter made love to me."

“What on earth did you say?" asks the woman.

Well, I just knocked on the door, and when it opened, I said to them, "I'm Nancy Pelosi’s chauffeur, and I’ve just killed the old cow."

Don’t you just love a story with a happy ending?

[Malaria_Kidd II]