What Got Stuck In Our Orifices In 2024

[Riddick]

"ANKLE, ABDOMINAL, AND NECK PAIN AFTER JUMPING OFF OF A 2ND FLOOR BALCONY. FOREIGN BODY IN RECTUM"

"WAS ROUGHHOUSING WITH HER HUSBAND WHO LIFTED HER UP AND ACCIDENTALLY DROPPED HER ON A HOT DOG COOKER. VAGINAL BLEEDING"

"TOOK A PIECE OF PLASTIC COATED PAPER FROM A MILK CONTAINER, ROLLED IT TIGHTLY, WRAPPED IT WITH TAPE TO THE SIZE OF 'GREATER THAN A CRAYON' AND INSERTED IT AS FAR AS HE COULD INTO HIS PENIS SEVERAL HOURS AGO"

Time really flies when you don't have something lodged in a sensitive area. But for those of you who do, read on to see if you made this year's list of the weirdest stuff that entered America's orifices. If not, there's always next year. LINK